It was about the last year that I conceived the bold and arduous project of arriving at moral perfection. I realized I needed to live with limited technology; I would conquer using written material instead of technological things, more time for homework, and more social time. As I knew what I thought was right and wrong, I did not see why I couldn’t do all at the same time. But soon I found out I had taken a task more difficult than I thought. My habits were effecting me the most.
I spent too much time using the internet for things that weren’t important such as myspace and facebook; I watched a lot of tv; I often spent time sitting around listening to my ipod. It took up the time I had to work on homework. The less homework time I had the less social time I had. Slowly I worked my way in creating a limit of technology time by making a list of things that I should improve on most.
1.Internet: I gave myself 1 hour of internet use per day.
2.T.V.: I let myself watch only 2 hours of t.v. per day.
3.Ipod: I could use my ipod for half and hour each day.
Monday, October 15, 2007
A Short and Light Decleration
Matt Mogan
October 14, 2007
Mr. Lovre Period 4
AP LA 11
A Short and Light Pastiche
We the People of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA do hereby with withdraw and utterly destroy all and known and unknown forms or personifications hereto of our allegiance with said Fried and Lovre for reasons that will be explained in tiresomely long sentences, garbled grammar and irksome foul-mouthing word usage. We people feel it necessary to withdraw and utterly destroy said allegiance for following reason; the cruel and uncalled for betrothal of vocabulary lessons to aforementioned AP LA class. They burned our villages and killed our people and grinned their serpent grins and therefore all allegiance must be totally and utterly pulverized beyond visible recognition so that not even dental records can confirm its identity. We [ ] appealed to them to stop this madness, yet they refused and now they have crossed ye line. They have been deaf to our voices and blind to our faces. We the representatives feel this deafness to be a problem which requires the full and complete withdrawal.
Grievance two, as it comes after grievance one is quite the irksome irk. We have had far to many essays that are long and hard to write to count, and they are really hard and take up much paper, which is another greivance, as there is not enough paper supplied to our class and since the Fried and Lovre shut down our class paper mills which were a major industry that brought in much commerce and trade to our ports and…
We therefore the representatives of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA in General Congress assembled, do in the name, and by the authority of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA do in the name, and by the authority of the good people of these states reject and renounce all allegiance to the Empire of Fried and Lovre.
October 14, 2007
Mr. Lovre Period 4
AP LA 11
A Short and Light Pastiche
We the People of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA do hereby with withdraw and utterly destroy all and known and unknown forms or personifications hereto of our allegiance with said Fried and Lovre for reasons that will be explained in tiresomely long sentences, garbled grammar and irksome foul-mouthing word usage. We people feel it necessary to withdraw and utterly destroy said allegiance for following reason; the cruel and uncalled for betrothal of vocabulary lessons to aforementioned AP LA class. They burned our villages and killed our people and grinned their serpent grins and therefore all allegiance must be totally and utterly pulverized beyond visible recognition so that not even dental records can confirm its identity. We [ ] appealed to them to stop this madness, yet they refused and now they have crossed ye line. They have been deaf to our voices and blind to our faces. We the representatives feel this deafness to be a problem which requires the full and complete withdrawal.
Grievance two, as it comes after grievance one is quite the irksome irk. We have had far to many essays that are long and hard to write to count, and they are really hard and take up much paper, which is another greivance, as there is not enough paper supplied to our class and since the Fried and Lovre shut down our class paper mills which were a major industry that brought in much commerce and trade to our ports and…
We therefore the representatives of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA in General Congress assembled, do in the name, and by the authority of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA do in the name, and by the authority of the good people of these states reject and renounce all allegiance to the Empire of Fried and Lovre.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Speech To The Owners Of The Seahawks by Spence Watson
To the Owners of the Seahawks: No man thinks more highly than I do of the aptitude, as well as the abilities of our mutual running back Shaun Alexander. But different men see the same subject in the same light, and as you may view his dismal performance in the games this season as a break in his talents, I choose to reasonably recognize them as the sun setting on a long career. This is no time for rationalization. The question before you is one of awful moment to this franchise.
Owners, it is natural to man to indulge in visions of 1000 yard rushing seasons. Are we apt to keep our eyes pointed toward the statistics of the 2005 season, and away from the looming forms of our opponents secondary? Is this the role of rich owners and head coaches, who are engaged in the arduous struggle for Superbowl rings? For my part, whatever anguish of spirit it may cost, I am willing to know the whole truth and to not avert my eyes from any accounts of inadmissibly low averages for yards-per-rush.
I ask you, gentlemen, as this season bears on with unacceptable performances of our running back, what shall be done? What means these low figures, if not the foreshadowing of lower? As Alexander’s yards-per-game drops in exceeding amounts each game, will ever something be done about it? Will this downward spiral ever be stopped?
And when these numbers become as low as they can be, what then? Who shall be there to turn to? Will our teams morale be strong enough to carry us through our season with a winning record? Nay, I say, we shall fall to depths previously unheard of, depths the rams have only recently glimpsed. Forbid it, Almighty God! There is still time for an age of Maurice Morris! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me 5.0 average yards-per-rush, or give me death!
Owners, it is natural to man to indulge in visions of 1000 yard rushing seasons. Are we apt to keep our eyes pointed toward the statistics of the 2005 season, and away from the looming forms of our opponents secondary? Is this the role of rich owners and head coaches, who are engaged in the arduous struggle for Superbowl rings? For my part, whatever anguish of spirit it may cost, I am willing to know the whole truth and to not avert my eyes from any accounts of inadmissibly low averages for yards-per-rush.
I ask you, gentlemen, as this season bears on with unacceptable performances of our running back, what shall be done? What means these low figures, if not the foreshadowing of lower? As Alexander’s yards-per-game drops in exceeding amounts each game, will ever something be done about it? Will this downward spiral ever be stopped?
And when these numbers become as low as they can be, what then? Who shall be there to turn to? Will our teams morale be strong enough to carry us through our season with a winning record? Nay, I say, we shall fall to depths previously unheard of, depths the rams have only recently glimpsed. Forbid it, Almighty God! There is still time for an age of Maurice Morris! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me 5.0 average yards-per-rush, or give me death!
Arriving at Moral Perfection by Anna Miller
(Arriving at Moral Perfection by Ben Franklin)
It was about this weekend that I conceived the bold and tedious project of arriving at moral perfection. I was told to try and live without committing any fault at any time, or getting any B’s in any classes; I would conquer all that either procrastination, indulgence, disinterest, or apathy might lead me into. As I knew, or thought I knew, what was right and wrong, I did not see the impossibility in attempting to be truly morally perfect. But I soon found that I had undertaken a task of more difficulty and more structured imagination than I had guessed. Procrastination was often too strong for the willingness to complete a certain English project in a timely manner. A need for joy was too strong to stay at home and get some much-needed rest on a three-day weekend.
In order to sum up my admittedly lame efforts, I have created a list of virtues that recently have proved themselves to be desirable in my seventeen-year-old life:
1. Drive. Do not wait until the last possible second to do things. Don’t watch hours upon hours of Law and Order marathons while putting off that chemistry lab write-up all day.
2. Friendship. Maintain friendships and make new ones.
3. Priorities. Don’t lose focus on what’s important. And that doesn’t always mean sacrificing your time for schoolwork.
4. Love. Speaks for itself.
It was about this weekend that I conceived the bold and tedious project of arriving at moral perfection. I was told to try and live without committing any fault at any time, or getting any B’s in any classes; I would conquer all that either procrastination, indulgence, disinterest, or apathy might lead me into. As I knew, or thought I knew, what was right and wrong, I did not see the impossibility in attempting to be truly morally perfect. But I soon found that I had undertaken a task of more difficulty and more structured imagination than I had guessed. Procrastination was often too strong for the willingness to complete a certain English project in a timely manner. A need for joy was too strong to stay at home and get some much-needed rest on a three-day weekend.
In order to sum up my admittedly lame efforts, I have created a list of virtues that recently have proved themselves to be desirable in my seventeen-year-old life:
1. Drive. Do not wait until the last possible second to do things. Don’t watch hours upon hours of Law and Order marathons while putting off that chemistry lab write-up all day.
2. Friendship. Maintain friendships and make new ones.
3. Priorities. Don’t lose focus on what’s important. And that doesn’t always mean sacrificing your time for schoolwork.
4. Love. Speaks for itself.
A Response to Patrick Henry's Speech to the House of Burgesses - by Danny Schwartz
Mr. Henry: Your words at the church moved me, and no less. The rivulets of thought that sprang so readily from your mouth brought my head to a point of overwhelming curiosity. I could not for the life of me think what a man of my stature, pray, might do to strive to achieve such a lofty goal as to free the shackles of this country, liberate us from the tyranny of the British. I own but a tavern, lead a simple life, befriending those who come to my establishment. They say I am the kindest man in Richmond. Maybe they are right, and I am flattered, but what actions might I take to achieve what is rightfully mine? I am no more harmful than a squirrel in an acorn tree! Is vigilance, as you say, truly necessary? To prove what? That we are but vigilant? The British have angered the colonies with unwanted taxes, and I myself have suffered already. What benefit might vigilance provide? And what of bravery? True, it requires heart to stand up to what is wrong if what is wrong is the authority. I feel the frustration, as do many others. But what can my bravery do, save get me into trouble? I keep a tavern! I lack the ambition of yourself and many townspeople.
I feel your sentiments, their sentiments, and yet, those sentiments cannot manifest themselves within me as a desire to take action. In spite of the persuasiveness of your speech, I cannot help but feel the fight belongs in Boston. There they are unafraid to act out against this tyranny. It is an awful thing, tyranny, but should rebellion not be left to those who aspire it? These thoughts trouble me. I do not believe in my own ability to act, but at the same time liberty has meaning. Liberty is not everything, but without it, everything is nothing. Thus I respect your cause, and strive to make it my own.
I feel your sentiments, their sentiments, and yet, those sentiments cannot manifest themselves within me as a desire to take action. In spite of the persuasiveness of your speech, I cannot help but feel the fight belongs in Boston. There they are unafraid to act out against this tyranny. It is an awful thing, tyranny, but should rebellion not be left to those who aspire it? These thoughts trouble me. I do not believe in my own ability to act, but at the same time liberty has meaning. Liberty is not everything, but without it, everything is nothing. Thus I respect your cause, and strive to make it my own.
Declaration of True Eating by Vincent Kwan
In course of a food event it becomes necessary for people to eat food which connects them to another, and to assume among food to separate calories and fats to which the laws of eating and the natures of obesity entitles them, a decent respect to mixture of saturated and hydrogenated fats that they should declare the causes of which, tells us to eat.
We hold these truths: that all men and women are created equal; that they are endowed by their stomachs, with uncontrollable desire, that among these are good food, pleasure, and pursuit of many layers of fat; that secures these lovely, stomachs are instituted among people, deriving their hunger from the consent growling of the stomach; that any delicious combination of food becomes delicate of these ends, it is the right of the people to savage it, and to institute new peptic ulcers, laying it’s foundation of cracked open spaces, and organizing its pain in such form, as to them shall seem most like to effect their future eating habits and pleasure.
The present fast foods restaurants in United States of America is a history of heartburns and constipations, and over usage of many well scrubbed toilets; we grow tired of them giving us bad infections, from never flushed toilets, shall doom us all. The dislocating of a finger and obese kids will establish true tyranny upon the people of America.
They have refused to admit other accommodation of large people in the population, unless these people would die from fatty burgers and oily fries, inestimable to them, and formidable to food tyrants only.
They have rendered advertising signs for the children population, and superior to, their innocent and little healthy minds.
They have combined with others to subject us to a fast food desire in our daily lives and unacknowledged by the food department of health, giving them assent to their acts of pretend healthy ads, for protecting themselves from mobs of over-weight people among us, for protecting themselves from severe money lost for any countless deaths which they committed on the inhabitants of these state; for cutting off their own fingers thinking it’s fries; for imposing unwanted signs without the health departments consent; for depriving us for healthy benefits of life by eating; for transporting us beyond obesity, abolishing the real taste of angus beef in hamburgers, enlarging the dollar menu, so as to render it at one example and fit prices for introducing twenty-four grams of fat in these states; from taking away real healthy fats, abolishing our most valuable vitamins, to altering our vitamins with chemicals into our stomachs; for suspending our own eating habits, and declaring themselves the healthy industry for us.
We, the wannabe anorexic people of the United States of America gathered here today in my crib in the South end, by the holy name of Jesus, shall represent the authority of all people of these states shall reject the addicting taste of fake Angus beef, and other fast grown tomatoes and fries. We will free our states from their fully grown fast food factories, shall conclude peace once all McDonald’s in America, burns down to our very knees: we shall enjoy the new taste of actual Angus beef, may we pledge our stomachs to our lives, our fortune, and our sacred honor of true eating.
We hold these truths: that all men and women are created equal; that they are endowed by their stomachs, with uncontrollable desire, that among these are good food, pleasure, and pursuit of many layers of fat; that secures these lovely, stomachs are instituted among people, deriving their hunger from the consent growling of the stomach; that any delicious combination of food becomes delicate of these ends, it is the right of the people to savage it, and to institute new peptic ulcers, laying it’s foundation of cracked open spaces, and organizing its pain in such form, as to them shall seem most like to effect their future eating habits and pleasure.
The present fast foods restaurants in United States of America is a history of heartburns and constipations, and over usage of many well scrubbed toilets; we grow tired of them giving us bad infections, from never flushed toilets, shall doom us all. The dislocating of a finger and obese kids will establish true tyranny upon the people of America.
They have refused to admit other accommodation of large people in the population, unless these people would die from fatty burgers and oily fries, inestimable to them, and formidable to food tyrants only.
They have rendered advertising signs for the children population, and superior to, their innocent and little healthy minds.
They have combined with others to subject us to a fast food desire in our daily lives and unacknowledged by the food department of health, giving them assent to their acts of pretend healthy ads, for protecting themselves from mobs of over-weight people among us, for protecting themselves from severe money lost for any countless deaths which they committed on the inhabitants of these state; for cutting off their own fingers thinking it’s fries; for imposing unwanted signs without the health departments consent; for depriving us for healthy benefits of life by eating; for transporting us beyond obesity, abolishing the real taste of angus beef in hamburgers, enlarging the dollar menu, so as to render it at one example and fit prices for introducing twenty-four grams of fat in these states; from taking away real healthy fats, abolishing our most valuable vitamins, to altering our vitamins with chemicals into our stomachs; for suspending our own eating habits, and declaring themselves the healthy industry for us.
We, the wannabe anorexic people of the United States of America gathered here today in my crib in the South end, by the holy name of Jesus, shall represent the authority of all people of these states shall reject the addicting taste of fake Angus beef, and other fast grown tomatoes and fries. We will free our states from their fully grown fast food factories, shall conclude peace once all McDonald’s in America, burns down to our very knees: we shall enjoy the new taste of actual Angus beef, may we pledge our stomachs to our lives, our fortune, and our sacred honor of true eating.
A Declaration to Our Obnoxious Visitors, by Rebecca Cohen
When, in the course of hosting houseguests, it become necessary for the hosts to evict said guests from their abode, and to assume once more the peace and privacy to which the laws of courtesy entitle them, a desire to prevent the situation from recurring requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the eviction.
We hold these principles of etiquette to be self-evident: that all people desire to be equally respected; that they are endowed by their Creator with inalienable rights; that among these are sleep, privacy, and the pursuit of their own interests; that to secure these rights, humans are inculcated with basic manners, deriving their power from the mutual consent of society; and that whenever a houseguest becomes destructive of these ends, it is the right of the hosts to banish him from their residence.
Such has been the patient sufferance of my family; and such is now the necessity which constrains us to expunge my father’s college buddy and his children from our home. To prove this, let facts be submitted to a sympathetic listener for the truth of which I pledge a faith unsullied by lies, bias, or hyperbole.
They have refused to be silent at 1:00 AM, when all normal people are sound asleep.
They have forbidden us to remove their strange tofu products from our refrigerator, and have subjected us to meals made entirely from health food.
They have endeavored to make us as uncomfortable as possible by discussing their personal issues in public.
They have made unusual, uncomfortable, and disturbing fart jokes at the dinner table.
They have made us dependant on their whims alone for planning our daily schedule, and have required us to visit tourist traps such as the Space Needle on a regular basis.
They have plundered our drawers in search of diversion, disregarding our requests that they not paw through our personal items.
They have subjected us to their company at every waking hour, willfully ignoring our hints that they should entertain themselves.
A family whose character is thus marked by every act which may define boorishness is unfit to stay in the home of another family. Nor have we been wanting in attentions to their whims. We have tactfully reminded them of the tenets of civility, and we have appealed to their common sense and compassion to cease these invasive behaviors which interrupt our rest and peace of mind. They have been deaf to the voice of decency. We must therefore acquiesce in the necessity which proclaims our eternal seperation!
We therefore the residents of this house do solemnly publish and declare, in the name of our sanity and well being, that we are, and of right ought to be, free of these visitors; that we are absolved from all allegiance with them, and that all social connection between us is, and ought to be, totally dissolved; and that as independent and long-suffering hosts, we have full power to expel them from our home.
And for the support of this declaration, with a firm reliance on the authorization of Ms. Manners, we mutually pledge to each other our support, our allowances, and the honor of our family.
We hold these principles of etiquette to be self-evident: that all people desire to be equally respected; that they are endowed by their Creator with inalienable rights; that among these are sleep, privacy, and the pursuit of their own interests; that to secure these rights, humans are inculcated with basic manners, deriving their power from the mutual consent of society; and that whenever a houseguest becomes destructive of these ends, it is the right of the hosts to banish him from their residence.
Such has been the patient sufferance of my family; and such is now the necessity which constrains us to expunge my father’s college buddy and his children from our home. To prove this, let facts be submitted to a sympathetic listener for the truth of which I pledge a faith unsullied by lies, bias, or hyperbole.
They have refused to be silent at 1:00 AM, when all normal people are sound asleep.
They have forbidden us to remove their strange tofu products from our refrigerator, and have subjected us to meals made entirely from health food.
They have endeavored to make us as uncomfortable as possible by discussing their personal issues in public.
They have made unusual, uncomfortable, and disturbing fart jokes at the dinner table.
They have made us dependant on their whims alone for planning our daily schedule, and have required us to visit tourist traps such as the Space Needle on a regular basis.
They have plundered our drawers in search of diversion, disregarding our requests that they not paw through our personal items.
They have subjected us to their company at every waking hour, willfully ignoring our hints that they should entertain themselves.
A family whose character is thus marked by every act which may define boorishness is unfit to stay in the home of another family. Nor have we been wanting in attentions to their whims. We have tactfully reminded them of the tenets of civility, and we have appealed to their common sense and compassion to cease these invasive behaviors which interrupt our rest and peace of mind. They have been deaf to the voice of decency. We must therefore acquiesce in the necessity which proclaims our eternal seperation!
We therefore the residents of this house do solemnly publish and declare, in the name of our sanity and well being, that we are, and of right ought to be, free of these visitors; that we are absolved from all allegiance with them, and that all social connection between us is, and ought to be, totally dissolved; and that as independent and long-suffering hosts, we have full power to expel them from our home.
And for the support of this declaration, with a firm reliance on the authorization of Ms. Manners, we mutually pledge to each other our support, our allowances, and the honor of our family.
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