A Short and Light Decleration

Matt Mogan
October 14, 2007
Mr. Lovre Period 4
AP LA 11

A Short and Light Pastiche

We the People of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA do hereby with withdraw and utterly destroy all and known and unknown forms or personifications hereto of our allegiance with said Fried and Lovre for reasons that will be explained in tiresomely long sentences, garbled grammar and irksome foul-mouthing word usage. We people feel it necessary to withdraw and utterly destroy said allegiance for following reason; the cruel and uncalled for betrothal of vocabulary lessons to aforementioned AP LA class. They burned our villages and killed our people and grinned their serpent grins and therefore all allegiance must be totally and utterly pulverized beyond visible recognition so that not even dental records can confirm its identity. We [ ] appealed to them to stop this madness, yet they refused and now they have crossed ye line. They have been deaf to our voices and blind to our faces. We the representatives feel this deafness to be a problem which requires the full and complete withdrawal.
Grievance two, as it comes after grievance one is quite the irksome irk. We have had far to many essays that are long and hard to write to count, and they are really hard and take up much paper, which is another greivance, as there is not enough paper supplied to our class and since the Fried and Lovre shut down our class paper mills which were a major industry that brought in much commerce and trade to our ports and…
We therefore the representatives of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA in General Congress assembled, do in the name, and by the authority of the United Students of Fourth Period AP LA do in the name, and by the authority of the good people of these states reject and renounce all allegiance to the Empire of Fried and Lovre.